Summary - Highlights - Questions & Observations

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SUMMARY

As of 1986, I have a mother and father living in a two story home. XX is renting and working in the city. I'm flying around New England.

In 1987, my father passes away.

My mother is doing just fine on her own until 2001. My mother decides to sell the family home (can no longer handle stairs). Proceeds go into a new home for her and XX (she'll live downstairs). Both names are on the deed and XX takes a mortgage on the balance.

Also in 2001, I move my family about two hours away.

In 2001 she nearly dies due to respiratory arrest. She slowly recovers. XX probably starts opening her mail and writing checks from her account to pay her bills.

Over the next several years, my mothers health deteriorates. She's hospitalized again for respiratory arrest. Her vision is suffering due to macular degeneration.

Also during these years, XX gets into debt. I have no idea why or how much. All I know is one or more debt collectors are after him (phone calls to mothers phone, notes on car wiper, personal appearances and of course mail).

About 2006, he's going with some guy. Maybe it's early 2007 they break-up.

Oct 2006 - my mothers accounts are frozen by debt collectors because XX was also on the accounts. She clears it up, and opens new accounts without his name. As time goes on (my mother becoming blind), XX will start paying his bills from her account. He signs her name on checks.

Dec 2006 - I deposit $15K into my moms savings account from stocks I found (from my father).

July 2007 - XX in hospital with mysterious heart problem. Almost kills him. I'm appointed Power of Attorney for my mother. From here on, my mother is blind. XX is opening all her mail, writing out checks (signing her name) and using her credit and ATM cards.

Early 2009 - three financial institutions that my mother uses merge together (banking, insurance and credit card). With a new ATM card, XX has access to my mothers savings account.

July 2009? - I discover XX has an alias name.

Aug 2009 - I discover $4K has disappeared from her savings in a few months. I close the account.

Aug 2009 - I come face to face with Dr.Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Due to concern for my mothers well-being (and my safety), I give the money back, depositing into her checking account. I also open a new credit card to replace one I closed.

Oct 2009 - her account is missing money. I estimate that a minimum of $11K is missing and the actual figure is probably over $20K.

HIGHLIGHTS

XX and mother are both on the deed
XX opens her mail
XX can't pay bills on time. Cable and electricity have both been been shut down at least once.
XX is signing her name to her checks
XX is freely using her credit and ATM cards
XX is paying his bills, some exorbitant in my opinion, from her account
XX has an alias name
XX is pursued by one or more debt collectors and a New York City Marshall
XX may have mental illness, perhaps bipolar or he's affected by drugs/medication. In any event, he's unstable.

QUESTIONS and OBSERVATIONS

I'm sure the bank would be very unhappy to hear he's signing her checks. I'm not sure what would happen if they pulled the ATM tapes. What about all the recent transactions at other banks? It's as if he's trying to be evasive.

When my mother dies, I assume the house becomes his.

When the house becomes his, it wouldn't surprise me if someone puts a lien on it. I'll never know.

In NY, since he's living in the same house with her, doesn't he need his own insurance? I doubt he has any. I think he's driving around thinking he's OK as my mother has auto insurance.

I'm wondering if I can get into trouble since I was POA and was aware of questionable transactions. Consideration has to be given to the fact I'm concerned for my mothers well-being, even if that means she goes broke.

I believe, legally, there is no crime (theft) since my mother would never report it as such. In other words, even though she knows he's stealing, she would never admit it to law enforcement. I have no proof of theft, it's all circumstantial.

 I found my mothers will. There's a part where it identifies me as the executor. I drew a line through my name and wrote refused. I know by doing that I voided the will. XX won't know until he produces it somewhere. The point was to separate myself from the entire mess. I can not let my finances and personal life get contaminated. XX will have to go through probate if there's any money left. She really doesn't need a will as there are no assets. The house will go to him. Insurance money is already targeted to us. Her bank account is almost exhausted. There is no reason at all for me to get involved and to advise all parties of her death. XX can run the show. Maybe he'll really screw up and end up in jail. Can I get that lucky?

Would the IRS be interested in the money he's spending like it's his?

Can XX get fired from his job? He told the hospice nurse he's a credit officer. Wouldn't that give him access to sensitive information? Could he be an identity thief?

Does the use of an alias name suggest criminal activity? How does one get an alias?

What do I do? She's basically a hostage. Any action or inaction I take will affect her negatively. It seems I can do nothing until she dies. But then what?

When all hits the fan, will it be triggered from the bank? I mean, if I wanted to, I wouldn't just call the police, would I? Do I need a lawyer? Why (stupid question) and what kind?

I should note I have a plan and a strategy. I don't want to write about it in case he finds this site.