Our Days in Limbo

(God how can it still be tuesday?)

Right now is the last week before school. I like to call this time Limbo because almost everything is done and the rest that you can do you can't because its not time to do whatever yet. It feels like I'm helplessly floating and all I can do is wait. I just float and wait. The majority of my stuff is pack I just lack a few things and I move in this saturday. Right now I'm weighing the pros and cons of leaving and I'm finding more pros than cons.

Pro 1 No more crazy family. My brother, Perry, just came back from Colorado today. And since he's the prodical son a feast was made in his honor. And I remembered why I hate dinners at the "good" table. Because we're forced to talk to each other. We're eating and Pam is telling us about her day at the school (she's a kindergarden teacher) about a speaker who was talking about stereotypes. And Dad started talking about latinos and being a stereotypical redneck and idiot. And then its silent for a few minutes and then Perry starts talking about how horrible he looks because he has one zit on his face. I hate it when good looking people think they're ugly. Like the skeleton chick that asks if the dress she's wearing makes her look fat. Its so stupid. And the talking continues and I really want to hang myself. Its just so untolerable.

Pro 2 No more stupid friends. So today Seth asks me if I wanted to go to the mall with him to hang out. I hate the mall. I loathe and despise it and the fact that its a "hang out". I hate going because my favorite bookstore was taken out for a Hollister because we need more overpriced clothes. But I tell him I want to go because I'm about to move and it'll a month or so before I can visit. So I grab season seven of Buffy for him and I jump in my truck and drive. Then it starts raining. Its so bad I can barely see the road. After like thirty minutes I made it to his drive way and I text him saying that he needs to unlock the door. He texts back and says he's at the mall. I slam my foot on the brake. What the hell?! How did he neglect to tell me this? I tell him that I'm going home and that I'm tired of how he always does this and to enjoy his shopping. He says yeah...screwed up again...if it matters sorry. I laugh. Sorry? Sorry? He has no idea what sorry is. I text back bet you are. "Yeah, Jay, I intentionally do this so you can feel let down and angry" and I just say whatever. I honestly do not care anymore. I've been pissed at him for so long and I didn't give him nearly as much hell as he deserved. I'm just happy I won't have to deal with him now.

Pro 3 Less chores. At my house we have a two acre yard and I take care of all the yard work like mowing and what not and I help with laundry and dishes and cleaning. Well coming from a big family it was a lot easier when I had my older siblings at home helping. But over the past few years its been just me because my dad is a lazy ass. Grant it he works shift work but he could help a little.

I don't know. Right now I feel like I'm more than ready to go. I'm looking forward to my theatre professor and doing shows. And I'm looking forward to making new friends and recreating myself. I just wish the time would accelerate. I hate this Limbo and how every minute feels like and hour.

Watching the clock,

Icarus