HELP-IS MY RELATIONSHIP DOOMED BECAUSE MY BOYFRIEND MASTURBATES ON THE PHONE WHEN HE THINKS I FELL ASLEEP????

I am really stressed out and ready to walk away from this relationship!! Advice please!!

     I have known my current boyfriend for around 10 years,the last 3 were ones that we were finally solid and comitted to each other mostly because he realized I was seriously done and about to walk away and he grew up and comitted! When we first met he was a real dog.Cheated,strip clubs,unprotected sex,std's...he got out lucky! One thing he never has been able to stop doing is masturbating and watching porn!! Now I do not have any problem with the 2,I own some porn myself and watch maybe twice a month and have a few toys myself that I will use maybe the same amount of times. I even have a fetish for toys and I'm not shy about going into those stores and browsing.
 
      My boyfriend is another story,he has always been more drawn to it. Once in our 20's when a friend and I were helping him move things from his room a huge black garbage bag was extracted from his closet.The friend and I were both like what is that??And embarassingly smiling he said thats all porn!! The friend laughed and kept helping move the stuff like whatever man and so did I but that moment scared me. I kept wondering what the heck kind of pervert am I allowing to come this close to me??? Needless to say seeing that was also a big piece of the puzzle that helped me in trying to figure out why he had the excessive approach he did whenever it came to anything to do with sex!! All this was dangerous to me and we were on and off for a lot of years after that- like me trying to drop him fully although I still had feelings for him and him stalking me when he sensed I was almost gone from his life.

         Now we're serious and he still watches this stuff in an excessive way though I know he tries to hide it from me. I took a bag of porn from him,not as big as the garbage bag,recently but I can still sense how much he's still doing it. He figured out how to attach his computer to his big flatscreen tv so he can search the "web" on the huge tv...theres always some roll of toilet tissue on the floor by his bed or by the living room couch and most recently the source of an argument is a huge bottle of vaseline intensive care lotion that has permanently been in FULL VIEW strewn with the rest of the tools!?! Last night he thought I was asleep on the phone and I heard him breathing heavily and knew what was going on,today I brought it up and it turned into another argument about other things.

         I ask him what is the problem,I'm here,we have a ridiculously fulfilling sex life or so he tells me,and we both want to be in this relationship so why do you feel the need to still do this???He reassures me its not me,it has nothing to do with me,thats what women dont understand.When he discovered a new toy I had purchased around 7 months ago on ebay,a little pocket rocket,he interrogated me as to why I was hiding it and how he doesnt mind me having toys or watching porn he just doesnt like when I hide it. We agreed that we would be open with our sexual outlets but I could tell he really didnt like me having having them or watching porn,at all! He can fulfill his needs and watch those women but he doesnt feel comfortable with his girlfreind getting pleasure from anything else but him.Very chauvanistic I know,but I dont care,I still do it but I know how to keep it in in moderation.

         My addictions are shopping,and for little stuff like 3 dollar earrings or clothes all the time from forever21 or the drugstore makeup aisle. The argument turned into one about that because he comes down on me really hard about my spending for little things like that,admittedly that I dont need anymore of,but he spends similiar amounts,5 dollars here and there on these porn dvds that I didnt even know he was still purchasing!! He is about to get a new apartment that he wants me to move into with him and we even want to start a family soon and eventually get married.I may even enroll in a local college to his apartment that I can only attend if I live with him. I'm worried however about going futher into this  relationship if this porn problem is going to cause us to fail.

         Sorry to have been longwinded about it but I really am at my wits end about this,I need to know is what happens between us normal and wont break up a marriage or is this a problem I need to know about and that will cause us to break up before I decide to commit anymore???