“Well, that was fun.”
When we sleep with you for the first time, we can’t help but wonder if we’re just another notch on your bedpost. So when you make a flippant comment, especially if it’s followed by a mad scramble for your boxer shorts, it’s sure to freak us out.
“Um, I think your Aunt Flo is in town.”
Guess what? Only our Great Aunt Mildred would call it that. Be a grown-up and try not to make a big deal having sex while we’re on our period it or we’ll pretend you have cooties and never have sex with you again.
"Your tummy feels so soft.”
We love it when you compliment our body, but you better be damn sure it’s a part we’re proud of before you praise it in bed. Even the most confident chicks can use a boost to feel sexier naked. It doesn’t matter how much you adore our curves, drawing attention to something we may be insecure about sucks our libido dry.
Another woman’s name.
This really needs no explanation, so let’s move on to how you can make it up to us. First, apologize. Then, apologize. Then, full-body massage.
“Shh!”
Seriously? Either we’ve turned up the volume because we want you to know how good we feel or you’re just totally blowing our mind. Sometimes we like to let go in bed. You really want us to simmer down?
“Do you mind if my roommate joins us?”
Hell yeah, we mind. Nothing makes our douche bag detector go off like the suggestion of an impromptu threesome. It’s not that we’re necessarily even against a ménage à trois, but we want to be damn sure we know whose playing the game before we strip down.
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Reprinted with permission of Hearst Communications, Inc.
