Weird or Relatable: Sometimes I'm Jealous of My Single Friends

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  Posted by debby Fri Oct 30, 2009 11:43am PDT

  Just remember that the single friends are jealous you have someone to love you and who is there for you unconditionally.

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  Posted by Coug Girl Fri Oct 30, 2009 12:03pm PDT

  I would never trade my married and maternal life for any of my single friends lives. And I still get butterflies with my husband. And as for a monthly date night, I don't think that's what makes a relationship better. I think it's the little things you do and get that make things great. I'd much rather my husband every once in a while send me flowers just because, than have a set night a month we go to dinner. But I'm lucky to have a husband like that.

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  Posted by Mysterious Gryphon Fri Oct 30, 2009 12:25pm PDT

  I so completely know what you're saying here.

  Married mom-bie types are always saying how wonderful and perfect their lives are - and then they get defensive and angry when you don't believe them. No one is perfect, and no one's life is perfect. Women who claim that theirs is are liars, plain and simple. The most interesting, real, and good women are willing and able to admit that they sometimes long for something else.

  I am about to get married. Sometimes I think back on the days of three dates in a weekend and I miss desperately the excitement of getting all done up and wondering if this was the man I would spend the rest of my life with, and if he would kiss me, and if I would let him, and if he'd ask me out again ... I miss men really, really working hard to impress me. I miss overt attempts at romance, instead of the slow, gentle burn of a long-term love.

  So to answer your question, relatable. Totally, totally relatable.

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  Posted by Maya Fri Oct 30, 2009 12:32pm PDT

  I don't think that it's weird to feel like that sometimes. We can all pretend, but we know that life is very different when you're in a relationship. There are just things that you can't do any more.

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  Posted by Skkk Fri Oct 30, 2009 12:44pm PDT

  For me, not so relatable. I get all the details from my single friends and 90% of them are horror stories. I love asking the "what are you wearing" and "where are you going" questions, and I get excited for them...but not jealous. Unfortunately for them, the dates seldom end up a good experience and I thank my lucky start I met the right guy and don't have to go through that again.

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  Posted by DavidV Fri Oct 30, 2009 12:45pm PDT

  "Maybe I just need to make Drew institute a monthly date night to let me experience that energy again!"

  This might shed light on part of your supposed problem. 1) Why don't you institute it, 2) "Make him???" 3) "Let ME experience" Taken together, sounds manipulative and self-centered, to be honest.

  The reason your friends are dating is because they don't have a committed special someone in their lives. As someone who's "met the perfect guy," you can be "really jealous" of your friends if you want. Probably shouldn't be expecting an avalanche of sympathy, though.

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  Posted by Joy in Seattle Fri Oct 30, 2009 12:48pm PDT

  I feel the same way about my kidless friends. I'd never trade in a million years, yet sometimes I get really jealous that they are off doing stuff I'd like to do and I need to pick the kid up from Karate and make dinner.

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  Posted by Alex Fri Oct 30, 2009 1:07pm PDT

  i dont get jealous but i do miss the excitement and how we both try so hard to impress each other. we still do that but in a different way. i wouldnt tradde what i have now for anything in the world. This past month ive relised that ive found my soul mate. :)

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  Posted by Jonny Fri Oct 30, 2009 1:25pm PDT

  If you were married before the age of 25 or so, the feeling is normal, because you missed out on some irreplaceable personal growth. You will probably feel this way until middle age, when you will finally give up. By then, the cynicism will take hold.....

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  Posted by sara Fri Oct 30, 2009 1:28pm PDT

  lots of married people feel like you. it's normal...try to hear some bad stuff (herpes, cheating) and watch reality TV for a while...you'll soon start to feel better about your situation. everyone wants what they can't have...it's human and if you've been with your husband for a long time, that spark fades out. I've been there. i feel for you..good luck and "beans628" said it best.

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